Because my brain is on overload. I am driving myself crazy - there is just so much that still needs to be done.
We are trying to have a sit down dinner for our Christmas party this year. But my table will not fit all 12 people who are attending so we are trying to figure out a way to get some additional tables and make them fit in my tiny dining room, then we have to go to BJ's and get all the paper products and then we still have to get the tree and I need to get a few outfits - one for Christmas day, one for the baby shower I need to go to and one for New Years - they have to be comforable because my incision might still be sore and healing.
Plus there is still a few odds and end that need to be done around the house, like touch up paint and a major scrubbing of everything.
Plus I am really going to have to rely on John to do all the things around the house that I normally do - such as the wash and dishes and dinners and just maintaining a clean house. I like things done my way so this is going to be a tough one for me.
Then there is getting all of the food for the party. Then attending all of the doctors appointments I have along with Christmas related functions.
I know I keep thinking this surgery is going to be worse than it probably is going to be - but I need to prepare just in case I cannot do all of these things that I want and need to do.
Then my mind also drifts toward TTC. I keep thinking maybe just maybe they will find something and it will fix our problem and then we will do our 7th IUI in Feb and get pregnant and have our baby or babies in November - so this time next year I could be a mom. Or will next year be like this year - alot of work and no reward. What if they find nothing. We that be good or bad for us.
I know everything will get done - but it just seems like so much right now. I am exhausted just thinking about all of it.
2 comments:
You have a lot going on there Jackie! Have you tried guided meditation before bed? I know it might sound a bit silly but it really helps me. I am one of those people that could lay in bed for hours worrying about things but this cd I have always helps me relax. I could probably have a copy to you by Saturday if I put it in the mail tomorrow if you want.
It will all work out with your Christmas plans! No one will notice the spots that need paint or might not get cleaned up to your standards. I am sure your house looks great! I would get yourself some nice yoga pants for after the surgery. If my ovaries weren't about to pop out of my body I would come up and help you!
Try and do something to relax tonight.
I know...it is so overwhelming. I am always suprised when things actually end up getting done over the holidays. And that is with me NOT having surgery--that definitely complicates things.
It will get done. :)
xx
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