I am freaking out because everything is going so well in this pregnancy and that is not like me - I do not have good luck - I do not have good things happen to me - this is such a blessing and I am so grateful - but all I keep thinking is I am waiting for the other shoe to drop - isn't that sad. I just want a healthy baby boy at the end of this.
I am missing my mom so much - she will be gone 11 years on October 3rd and sometimes it seems like yesterday - I wish she was here with me now - I seems so much harder being pregnant without my mom - I am actually jealous of my SIL who is due 3 weeks after me because she has her mom and her sisters and I have no strong female presence in my life.
Please please let Colin stay in there for 40 weeks and please please please let him be a healthy happy baby - that is all I want.
1 comment:
I have been following your blog forever but have never commented. I completely understand your fears and I think anyone in your position would feel the same. My only advice would be to try to change your outlook and think positive thoughts whenever a bad feeling or thought crosses your mind. That is the only thing you have control over. Everything else is up to God, the Universe, whatever you believe in. Trust me, please think positive and you will at the least feel better. I heard someone say once that worry is useless because you cannot actually do anything about the thing that you are worrying about and it may never even happen - but even if it does happen you will have to deal with it then anyway and your worry would not have helped you to deal with it. Anyway I am SO super proud of you and think you are truly an amazing and inspirational person - so many can learn from you. I just hope you can change your perspective so that you can enjoy this time even more and so that you don't unconsciously/subconsciously create that which you fear. All the best of luck to you, John and Colin. What an amazing time for you!!!
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