It is my goal to only thing positive and not let myself get depressed about the situation that we are in. It is going to be okay - we will have a baby one day. I do not want to be this bitter person - so jealous of other who have families - I will have my family one day. I do not see me and John as a family - I see us as a couple and once we have a baby I will see us as a family.
It is a fresh start - a new leaf - John is thinking the same way - this is our turning point - one year of trying on our own and one year with our current RE. This coming year will result in a pregnancy - I just know it. A new RE and hopefully better options - this is going to work.
I have alot to be thankful for - we have a lovely home, good jobs with benefits (partial IF benefits), we are both in good health, we have caring people in our lives, good friends and family and most importantly we truly love each other - I am still so in love with John. I know everyone says IF brings couples closer together - but honestly it really has not brought us closer together - it is hard on us. We both love each other and I am sure at the end of this journey we will look back and say it made us stronger but not now - now it is hard - it is a daily stuggle. I will not lie.
I can honestly say this past weekend I had fun and I did not once think about infertility - which is a new one for me. It always seems to be on my mind.
1 comment:
I think that positive thinking/turning point thing is a good idea. My sister brought that up to me the other day. I think I am going to try that my next cycle that is coming up soon. It's good that you were able to enjoy yourself and not think about IF. Maybe you will get a surprise BFP on your cycle off!
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